top of page
I Love You but I Don't Trust You
April 29, 2024
Hey Clawson Family!
Song:
Scripture:
Matthew 18:15-17 New Living Translation
15 “If another believer[a] sins against you,[b] go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. 16 But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. 17 If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector.
2 Corinthians 6:14 New King James Version
14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what [a]fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what [b]communion has light with darkness?
1 Corinthians 5:11 New Living Translation
11 I meant that you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a believer[a] yet indulges in sexual sin, or is greedy, or worships idols, or is abusive, or is a drunkard, or cheats people. Don’t even eat with such people.
Titus 3:10 New Living Translation
10 If people are causing divisions among you, give a first and second warning. After that, have nothing more to do with them.
Devotional:
Have you ever felt that even though you love someone and you forgive them, you don’t trust them. It’s difficult to know how to handle that relationship, how close to allow them in your life, or if you should completely cut them out of your life.
Forgiveness is a release but healing is a process.
Forgiveness is a supernatural work that can happen instantaneously, but sometimes Healing is a process. When a bone is broken it is placed in a cast to restrict movement by creating a boundary. It forces the bone to stay in the correct place until it is fully healed. It also provides protects from things that could damage the bone again.
Healing requires healthy boundaries. As we choose to love and forgive that does not mean we have to allow dysfunction in our lives .
Scripture actually gives us steps to take with someone when they hurt us, offend us, or sin against us.
Bring it to their attention
A lot of people walk away from relationships without ever taking the biblical steps that God requires from us as christians. This is not a suggestion, Jesus telling us exactly what to do and if we are not doing it this way then we are in the wrong. He tells us to first go privately and have a conversation about what happened.
We don’t go tell everyone what happened, we don’t ask 37 people for advice on the situation, we don’t become a keyboard warrior, or post on social media, We go to them with the right heart and tell them what they did and how it has affected us. We give them a chance to repent and make it right. Offense festers in silence. And Unless you express that you were hurt or that you were offended you cannot expect someone to know.
Every relationship worth keeping will only thrive with uncomfortable conversations. If step 1 doesn’t work then we move to step two.
2. Bring a witness
Bring someone that both parties have a relationship with, and that will try to bring peach and reconciliation.
If you have done both of these steps and this person is still not repenting and making amends then you move to step 3.
3. Bring them before the church or church leadership
Here comes the boundary. After these 3 steps of trying to make things right if they still do not make it right, Jesus said let them be like a pagan or a tax collector. This does not mean we are now allowed to hold unforgiveness. It means it is time to put a boundary for protection moving forward. That begs the question how do we treat someone who is a pagan or someone who is of the world and not of the faith?
The easy answer is that we do not allow them to hold influence over us, but our relationship that we have with them is to be an influence to them.
We serve a God of Love and forgiveness but we also serve a God of boundaries. Healthy boundaries are good for us, for the church, and for the world.
Forgiveness is for healing. Boundaries are for protecting the future. Protection from hurt, protection from temptation, protection from sin.
Journal:
In your journal today write down the steps Jesus has asked us to take when someone has hurt, offended or sinned against us. Are you currently practicing these steps?
If you struggle in this area write down what he biggest reason that stops you.
If you are using this process write down how this has worked in your relationships.
Training:
Father,
I can’t thank You enough for the promise that I can trust You at all times. Even though people may fail me … even though others may abandon me … You never will. I’m choosing to let that truth steady my heart today.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Who are people in your life that maybe you need to start this process with? Today ask God to give you the courage and boldness to have tough conversations in order to have healing and peace.
bottom of page