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Boundaries Change Based on Trust
May 3, 2024
Hey Clawson Family!
Song:
Scripture:
Proverbs 17:27 New Living Translation
27 A truly wise person uses few words; a person with understanding is even-tempered
Proverbs 29:25 New Living Translation
25 Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the Lord means safety.
Devotional
I love you, but I don’t trust you. If I don’t trust you then a boundary needs to be in place until I can trust you with some access.
Trust is earned in drops and lost in buckets.
It takes time, years of trust sometimes until we are comfortable enough to give someone access to our life. Then with one really bad decision all trust can be lost. That lost trust is not gained back tomorrow. It is earned in drops and lost in buckets.
So how do we regain trust? Is it possible? It is actually pretty simple.
Truth + Time = Trust
And if we are the ones that lost the trust because of poor decisions, we need to understand forgiveness can happen in a moment, but healing takes time. We need to be open to having barriers put up until we can earn the trust back again.
But on the other hand when we are the one that is hurt, we need allow they other person to gain back our trust if they are willing to do the work. Trust can be given again, it just takes time and work.
Today allow the Holy Spirit to lead you in creating new boundaries in your lives.
Boundaries on who we allow to influence us and who we are yoked with, boundaries with family to keep our hearts pure and our heads sane, boundaries to help with balance and responsibility in our live on who we can and should not trust.
Journal:
In your journal today it's going to be a little more time consuming but I challenge you to put in the work!
Answer the following questions in your journal.
- What kind of person do I want to be, not just in this relationship but consistently in all my relationships?
- What do I need to do in this relationship to stay consistent in my character, conduct and communication?
- Do I feel the freedom in this relationship to communicate what I can and cannot give without the fear of being punished or pushed away?
- What are some realistic restrictions I can place on myself to reduce the access this person has to my emotional or physical wellbeing?
- In what ways is this person’s unpredictable behavior negatively impacting my trust in my other relationships?
- How am I suffering the consequences of another person's choices more than they are?
- What are this person's most realistic and most unrealistic expectations of me? What are my most realistic and most unrealistic expectations of them?
- What boundaries do I need to put in place?
These questions to consider aren’t to further complicate our relationships. Instead, these are meant to help identify where we need to place healthy boundaries to keep our hearts pure and our head sane!
Training
Father,
In order to consider areas in my life where I may need to implement some healthy boundaries, I will need Your help. Help me to process these decisions thoroughly, through the lens of wisdom and with godly counsel. I long to see health in all of my relationships, so help me get honest to see where any God-honoring boundaries could make this possible.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
As you begin to process the questions above and evaluate where in your life you need to implement boundaries, remember this: This may be hard, but you are not alone. You are seen by the God! And He is a God of boundaries! He keeps track of your sorrows, collects your tears and has recorded each one in His book.
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